Columnists
And then?
Well, and then we had a Trash Bash Day in the County. It wasn’t a “Pandemic Trash Bash”. It was just a plain, old Trash Bash. It was a “Put on those blue gloves, grab the green trash bags and pick up trash”, Trash Bash day. While I’m all for being mindful of debris and putting it in its proper place, I actually had to force myself to go out, pick up my “kit” and then corral my family into trashbashing on our street. I’m not a fan of anything that smacks of socializing, but there ain’t nothin’ really sociable about waste management. However, while cruising the street in our garbage-picking finery, the neighbours did stop to say “hello”, admire the grandkid and chat about their pandemic lives and thank us for braving the streets. It cheered us along when people called out their “thanks” from their car windows. At least that’s what I heard, “thanks”. And, for a couple of hours I was okay with the social aspect of cleaning the street. Besides, what a terrific way to get out-of-doors, do something nice for the community and have a few laughs. Picking up garbage doesn’t usually make people laugh, but youngest child of mine and youngest grandchild of mine managed to find humour in the mud-covered plastic rat we found and the forlorn pair of men’s boots. Grandson of mine drove the “pick up wagon” and offered a “yucky and a yahoo”, here and there, and a few nose pinches accompanied by a “that’s stinky” as we rumbled along.
We found the abandoned boots at the service entry of a nearby pharmacy, and the plastic rat was on the sidewalk. The rat was covered in mud, although it sort of looked like it was covered in poop, which was tremendously amusing to the little kid. The boots looked a bit worse for wear. Since my team and I live in town, we didn’t find a lot of really exciting garbage. If the organizers have a contest for the best find, next year, I don’t think we’ll win any prizes. People don’t usually dump their Lazy-Boy recliners or piddle-stained mattresses or empty Wig Cleaner jugs on residential lawns. And we certainly didn’t find a five dollar bill or a jar of pickled asparagus or a pair of underpants or a bathing suit bottom. Being on the garbage-trol in town is kinda mundane and means we picked up a lot of disposable face masks, plastic bags, chip bags, candy wrappers, buckets of cigarette butts, those weird little dental floss tools and a few fast food beverage containers.
My take on the morning of Trash Bashing? Well, I’d really like to know what kind of idiot thinks it’s “hunky dory” to flick their cigarette butts or their disposable beverage cups into the street or onto a lawn or sidewalk. The butt of a cigarette is primarily the filter. The filter is made of a type of plasticized cellulose acetate. It does not readily biodegrade. Stop fooling your lazy self into thinking a butt is good for the environment. If you have to smoke, and some of y’all do, you really should be carrying a portable ashtray and take those butts home for proper disposal. As for the other self-centred whack-a-doodles who toss take-away containers along the roadside, those containers really need to go home with you and find a cosy space in your blue box, garbage can or compost heap (whichever is appropriate). Like a lot of causes, the people who take up one, like the Trash Bash, aren’t usually the people who perpetuate the problem being addressed. We all learn from the adventure, though.
Aside from my grumble about garbage-dumping-idiots, wouldn’t it be nice if the next Trash Bash saw more volunteers? It’s difficult to say what the littering culprits look like or know what they do for a living or to imagine where they live or how old they are, but wouldn’t it be nice if we could get those people to join the 2022 Trash Bash crew? I believe the best way to make this happen is each one of us (who has Trash Bashed and who will Trash Bash again) should ask our friends and neighbours (who haven’t Trash Bashed) to join them in 2022. It would be like a the 1980s Fabrege Organics commercial with Heather Locklear looking into the camera, telling one person and that one person told another person and that person told a person. You’d have to be old enough to remember the commercial.
Is there a cure for littering? Yep. Plain and simply, it’s time to wake up and be aware and take responsibility for our own messes. Let’s not blame anyone else or any business for the kind of garbage we all found along the roads of the County. See you next year.
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