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Cabin fever
we get a little cabin-feverish. So it’s time for a game. I’ve taken my cue from the old dictionary-based game where you pick a real word with an obscure defintion, and try to lure guessers into picking a false definition. Sometimes, guessers will vote for your false definition on the basis that it was a good effort even though patently nonsensical.
My topic is the origin of some phrases employing a male name. I’ve given you the choice of two answers. One I have just made up; the other I have chosen from an online source. There is a proliferation of sources on the Internet, from the Oxford English Dictionary to grammarphobia.com, the online slang dictionary, the free dictionary, the urban dictionary, phrases.org and so on. Not everyone agrees on the ‘correct’ origin of a phrase. And I’m no etymologist: I have an aversion to insects.
Anyway, here goes with a few alternatives.
FOR PETE’S SAKE
1. A polite euphemism for invoking, but avoiding the direct mention of, the name of God. (The same claim is made with regard to the expression “Great Scott”; while the expression “By the Lord Harry” is said to be a polite way of invoking the name of the devil and the phrase “By Jove” to invoke the Latin word for Jupiter).
2. An Irish corruption of “for peat’s ache”— the traditional justification for a drop of whiskey after a day’s turf digging. After a while, the Irish dropped any justification for a drop of whiskey, although the phrase is heard occasionally on national holidays. (In Ireland, expressions referring to Scott, Harry and Jove are thought of as English affectations and are uttered only by the brave or foolhardy.)
BOB’S YOUR UNCLE
1. From 19th century England: a favoured nephew of an influential poltitician named Robert received many plum appointments.
2. A defence to a paternity suit in the famous turn of the 20th century case from Wyoming of Blodgins v. Farnsworthy. Robert Farnsworthy convinced a jury his brother William was the father of Ms. Blodgins’ child, Simon. Robert subsequently died by the hand of William, who apparently did not appreciate the gesture. Simon Blodgins went on to become a distinguished traffic court judge in the state capital, Cheyenne.
SMART ALECK
1. Based on a real life character in 19th century New York, a dandy who stole from customers who were otherwise engaged with his wife, but who got caught trying to bribe police.
2. A derogatory nickname for Alexander Graham Bell coined by rival inventor Thomas Edison. Edison thought Bell a more clever man than him but Bell never moved fast enough to patent all of his inventions and Edison often jumped in.
EVEN STEVENS
1. From an old Dutch term referring to money of little value. “Even Stevens” meant when items were traded, the cash difference between them was so small it was treated by both parties as equal enough.
2. From an unkind reference to United States Representative Thaddeus Stevens, who was often the last to understand something complicated. A document would be dumbed down so that “Even Stevens”could understand it.
NO WAY, JOSÉ
1. From a 1970s newspaper story refuting suggestions that a robot could beat a human at a sporting task.
2. From a 1920s story in Look magazine, about a drunkard who wants a refill of tequila. He is refused by a principled bartender, who insists he switch to sarsaparilla. The drunkard falls in love with the drink, uses his last dime to buy sarsaparilla futures and parlays them into a fortune in PepsiCo stock. He cuts the bartender in for five per cent, which the bartender uses to buy a Tim Hortons franchise, thereby making his own fortune.
LET GEORGE DO IT
1. From an ominpresent 15th century French cardinal who was notorious for taking on work himself instead of delegating it to others.
2. Attributed to Ringo Starr, when told it was his turn to get the coffee for the other members of The Beatles during a recording session. (Starr was made to get the coffee anyway, and wrote and recorded Octopus’s Garden as his revenge).
ANY TOM, DICK AND HARRY
1. From an early 19th century American Farmer’s Almanac, meaning anyone. Same purpose as ‘Jack of all trades,’ which originated in 17th century England.
2. From the title of Harry Belafonte’s second volume of autobiography, on growing up in the same household as Tom and Dick Smothers. The book was a bestseller as it purported to settle the question of which brother received the greatest maternal affection.
DOUBTING THOMAS
1. From the Bible, referring to the apostle Thomas, who wouldn’t take anything on faith.
2. A 16th century Irish term named after the famous firebrand Thomas O’Mulcair, who asserted that if elected he would not run a deficit. The assertion was widely disbelieved, and O’Mulcair never got a chance to prove himself true to his word.
How did you score? The right answers were all number ones. But hopefully you voted for a couple of number twos on the basis that they were good efforts even if obviously false. No? Then it’s time to break that cabin fever and go outside and play.
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