CWC and a ukelele

Ever wonder what some people, who live in Prince Edward County, do to “get away from it all”? Well, LOML and I went to the cottage in Haliburton for the weekend, because it was neither rainy nor cold enough here. And because we are seasoned travellers, LOML and I are able to anticipate all manner of travel situations, and we take pride in our uncanny ability to pack accordingly. We have, over the years, created a cottage weekend checklist, or CWC. If you’re like us—and many of you are, but won’t admit it—the number one item on the CWC is in the beverage category. Gauging just how many beverages we will need for the entire weekend, for four people, involves a bit of math-magic. The formula looks a bit like this: four people, times the number of hours of rain, times the angst-ridden, pitch-black trip off the main road down the cottage road, times the number of people from around the lake who might show up for a bonfire, times the number of guitars and ukuleles around the bonfire, times the number of nights away. That equals a lot of beverages. If you factor in individual preferences, then the variety becomes part of the answer. You all know how thirsty you can become poking at the fire with a stick (don’t forget the dehydration brought on by the search for the perfect fire-poking- stick) and how parched you become singing your way through the ‘60s and eating burnt popcorn, to say nothing of the toll taken on a body by the strumming, trying to remember the words to a Chuck Berry song and laughing.

But getting back to the list, the second item on our CWC is to have fabulous directions. I find it’s important for me, as the navigator, to have the best possible rock-by-rock landmark instructions to find the cottage. Once we get off the main road, just kiss GPS guidance goodbye. “Not a digitized road,” the disembodied voice tells us the moment we turn onto the twisting, gravelly backroads, looking for the rock with the number 12 painted on it, in the dark. This part of the weekend at the cottage makes me happy. The number one item on the list is beverages. Number three on our CWC is snacks and other food. Number three usually has to be compiled with the input, via emails and phone calls, of everyone who will be snacking and partaking the “other food”. Sometimes we remember to bring the coffee beans, but not the cream. Sometimes we end up with 15 bags of potato chips and no jujubes or M&Ms. Once we had the right kind of peanut butter, raspberry jam, fresh eggs and bacon (yes, bacon), but no bread. On one trip we decided to buy everything when we got there. However, once the navigator/cook gets that car unpacked, her thoughts focus directly on item number one. Getting into the car to drive along those undigitized back roads, in the dark, to pick up snacks and other food is a huge “ain’t gonna happen”. This I know, as the experienced navigator/ cook, who has done the long drive along dark roads followed by late night beverages, without snacks, only to face the dreaded early morning trip to town for snacks and other food. It’s an ugly sight.

Numbers four through 17 include reading glasses, reading material, clean undies, cell phones, camera, treats for the dog, guitars, ukuleles, sheet music, toiletries, pillows, toilet paper, towels, bug spray, flipflops, mouse traps and rain jackets. These are the less important items, thus their placement on the list. The list works for us. What we really need, however, is the GHCWC. The Going Home Cottage Weekend Checklist. As it turns out, the cottage is where my glasses go into hiding. If I have to buy one more pair of reading or bifocals, I’m going to consider laser surgery— right after a beverage or two and maybe some snacks.

theresa@wellingtontimes.ca