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High density advice
I read last week’s announcement from WestJet Airlines that it is going to operate a new “ultra-low-cost carrier” late this year with a certain amount of puzzlement. The company plans to acquire 10 new Boeing planes that will be configured to WestJet’s specifications as “high-density.” But how can seating possibly get even denser than the sardine class seating currently offered to economy class passengers?
It will be interesting, in a macabre sort of way, to see how the company manages to cram in the extra seats. Will the planes look like ancient Greek triremes, with three stacked floors of seating? Will they make creative use of what would otherwise be called the luggage compartment or the wheel wells? Will the seating now be on benches, more like church pews (though with seatbelts) than chairs with armrests?
But WestJet no doubt has a plan, and it sounds confident. “The complete unbundling of services and products in order to lower fares for the price-sensitive traveller has created [the ultra-low-cost carrier] category and our new airline will provide Canadians a pro-competitive, cheap and cheerful flying experience from a company with a proven track record,” says the press release.
Now the wording in the press release is interesting. “The complete unbundling of services and products” indicates that not only will WestJet try to get a higher density per planeload, but also that it will look at all the services and products passengers who pay economy fares take for granted—and charge for them if they are used. But doing that in a way that it remains “cheap and cheerful” will be WestJet’s challenge. So, let’s offer WestJet some unsolicited suggestions as to what it could charge for.
The first place is seating, of course. If you are obliged to sit on a bench, as I intimated above, then there will no doubt come a point during your trip at which you have desperate need for a cushion or a spell in a respite chair. Those could be provided at a charge, which would increase as the flight progresses.
The next place is luggage. Everyone tries to avoid checking baggage, because it costs to do so. So why is cabin baggage free? Why not charge for every piece you bring on board, even it it’s a purse and even if it fits under the seat in front of you?
Which leads us to the next place—food and drink. Most cafeterias don’t let you bring in your own food. Why doesn’t WestJet follow suit, and force people to buy from its in-flight menu? It’s not WestJet’s fault if people haven’t had the foresight to eat before boarding. But if it wants to remain cheap and cheerful, it should probably retain the ritual free snack. I suggest, however, that it stop giving everyone three pretzels wrapped as an individual serving, and instead just pass around a party-sized bag or two, so that those travellers who were pretzel lovers could eat their fill, and those who weren’t wouldn’t feel like they were cheated out of a benefit. It would be ecologically sensible: according to NASA statistics, it could save enough plastic wrapping to reach from here to the moon and back six times.
And that takes us to the more sensitive topic of “facilities.” Greater density will mean greater demand. Perhaps Westjet could charge $X per minute to use the facilities, maybe multiplied by the number of people in the lineup. And it could charge a special extra fee for those wanting to jump the queue.
In light of the unfortunate recent event in Chicago, it might also be possible to offer passengers insurance against being dragged off a plane. Such insurance might prove popular—so popular, though, that if everyone bought it, it wouldn’t work. Then you would have to offer super-premium insurance, which would give you super-priority protection against drag-off; but if everyone bought that, then you would market platinum-priority protection, and so on.
Other not so far fetched ideas might include a “hysterics contingency surcharge” for taking a child up to four years old on the plane; a “bothersome customer” fee for using the call button to summon a flight attendant (although life and death calls could justify a waiver); a “messy flyer” charge for those who leave detritus behind; a “priority deplaning” charge for those who want to get off the plane quickly; and a “move it, granny” fee for people who slow down traffic.
If it gets really desperate, WestJet crew could generate revenue by resorting to annoyance tactics, like repeating in-flight safety demonstrations, or goading a known nervous flyer, or having the captain go over the intercom and ask for help figuring out where he is; until someone yells “Enough!” and pays them to stop. After all, you have a captive audience. This method does, however, have a potential publicity downside.
When you think about it, WestJet has set itself a tough challenge. It must offer lower prices so that people will find it worthwhile to travel high-density class rather than regular economy class. At the same time, it must make basic high-density travel sufficiently unappealing that people will pay to obtain upgrades to it. Good luck with that one, West- Jet; you’ll need help from wiser sources than me.
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