Of values and symbols

The proposed new Quebec Charter of Values has caught the eye of more than one County official.

So far, no one has made a legal fuss over the overtly religious ritual of reciting the Lord’s Prayer before council meetings (only for those who wish to join in). Council voted to stick with the status quo earlier this year, even though the Ontario Court of Appeal ruled against the practice in 1999 in a case involving the town of Penetanguishine. But the more insidious implications of not doing something to keep personal bias out of the public service are starting to worry people.

“It’s important that County employees represent the things that the County stands for, like fair dealing for everyone,” said the official, who asked that his or her name not be used. And hockey came foward as the example.

“Now I’m not saying hockey is the same as religion. But work it through. Let’s suppose that a County employee comes to fix a pothole on your street, right across from your house. Let’s suppose that the County employee has a Toronto Maple Leafs tattoo on his arm. And then let’s suppose that you have Boston Bruins wallpaper in your den, which can be seen from the street. How are you to be certain that the County employee did the best possible job, and didn’t say to himself ‘well, after what the Bruins did to us in game seven, the least I can do for the cause is only pretend to fix the road and therefore wreck the transmission of a Bruins fan.’ And that’s just an example.”

“Take a broader example. Let’s suppose the person who comes to read your water meter is wearing a Dukes ballcap. Now it’s theoretically possible that you might not be a hockey fan (although why you’d be living in the County if that were so is beyond me), and that the wearing of the cap will incite you to make some derogatory comment about hockey fans; which might lead our County employee to inadvertently damage your prized petunia patch. The next thing you know we’re in court and the County is liable. I’m not saying it will happen; I’m just saying it could.”

So it appears that one of the items that will find its way onto the council agenda before municipal elections a year hence will be the adoption of a ‘values neutral’ attire and grooming program for council staff. And that in turn has attracted the attention of the County’s economic development commission, which is in the process of ‘rebranding’ the County.

“It’s very important that we use all the resources at our disposal,” said an insider. “That includes the dress and presentation of County staff. We’re after wine tourists driving BMWs. We can’t have them coming across County employees wearing mullet haircuts, listening to Alabama and driving Ford trucks. And if we’ve gone to all the trouble and expense of creating a new County logo with custom colours in muted browns, blues and greens, the last thing we want to do is have someone wearing an orange and yellow neon safety vest or something that is obviously just off the rack from WalMart. We need our County employees to be ambassadors—if that means requiring them to wear Giorgio Armani or Perry Ellis from approved colour swatches, well, it’s a line in the sand and their union local will just have to lump it. Besides, designer clothes are not really that expensive: you can order them over the internet, for goodness sake; and when you wear then you feel good about yourself.”

“Come to think of it, we can’t have County trucks parked outside McDonald’s or Tim Horton’s. It just sends off the wrong signal. We need them parked outside the more upscale places, no matter what it costs them; and if the service is a little slower, well, slow food is good for your digestion and more in keeping with County branding.”

Our contact paused for breath and then appeared to soften. “I can foresee that it will take us a year or so to implement a program, as we can’t expect County employees to replace their entire wardrobe all at once. And I suppose there is some risk that after a year or so, the County will rebrand itself and call itself the ‘tractor pull capital of Canada’, or ‘the place to get your feet muddy’ or something of the sort, in which case Leafs tattoos and Alabama music would be more than welcome. But it’s a risk that’s worth running, and in any event, if clothing standards change you can always take your desinger duds to the City Revival store.”

So while Quebec worries about hijabs and kippahs, the County frets about ballcaps and mullets. Yet each distinct society is struggling with the same fundamental issue of balancing the rights of the individual with the demands of a secular society. Isn’t democracy wonderful?

A clerical error caused a draft version of last week’s column to run. The revised version would have made everyone laugh and offended no one.”

dsimmonds@wellingtontimes.ca