Parfait!

Faultless. Flawless. Ideal. Impeccable. Indefectible. Irreproachable. Immaculate. Unblemished. Perfect.

Have you noticed, there’s a whole lot of “perfect” going on in the retail and food service industries these days. Go on, order a coffee and I’ll bet you dollars to dunking donuts the server is bound to pronounce your order, “perfect.” You’ve probably already ordered a perfect double-double or a perfect cappuccino or a perfect black coffee somewhere, sometime recently. Maybe you’ve asked for gravy on your fries and were surprised to learn that that’s perfect, too. How about when you tell a cashier you’re going to pay with plastic, your payment choice is likely going to be met with a perky, sing-songy “perfect.” Think about it. You’re nodding. Apparently, using a credit card or debit card is the perfect way to pay unless, of course, you change your mind and decide to pay with cash. But, apparently, cash is also “perfect.” Who could have guessed it?

We seem to be living in a world of “perfect.” Letting customers know they’ve made a good choice certainly isn’t a brand new approach to customer service. But how much “perfect” can there be in this world? The funny thing about using, or abusing, the word “perfect” is just how often it’s used. In the café, where I spend some quality time, the customers don’t seem to care if their selections meet my exacting culinary standards. Occasionally, I’ll treat them to a “super, peachy, keen” but only if they’ve asked about my disposition—which may or may not be “super, peachy, keen.” But, recently, on a crazy, busy day when I was a bit tired I once caught myself saying “perfect” to the request of the addition of hot peppers to a sandwich. Perfect hot peppers?

Seriously! What the H E double tomato slices was I thinking? But there it was, out of my yap before I could put the brakes on. While I’d rather not suggest anyone has flawless or faultless decision making skills when it comes to lunch, for some reason it seemed to make that particular customer smile. There you go. If a customer wants their egg salad on 12 grain with lettuce and tomato, who would I be to say it could be anything less than a sandwich choice beyond reproach?

Yes, we are we living in a world where we need to give and receive such flimsy reassurances. We have become so insecure, we’ve got to hear how ideal our expressed desires are. Yes we do. We are living in a world where everyone needs to meet with success even between two pieces of bread. Flaws and failures are no longer tolerated. We aren’t allowed the luxury of learning from a mistake. When I was a student, in the ’60s, I was thrilled to get 75 per cent on a test. I was seriously thrilled. Anything more than that was mondobeyondo. In my high school graduating year there were a total of five Ontario Scholars out of a field of over 500 students. (I wasn’t an Ontario Scholar, by the way.) When our youngest daughter graduated, the number of Ontario Scholars was unbelievable to me. How could so many students have attained such flawlessness, such perfection? Did this “perfect” obsession begin with our misunderstanding of what student success actually means?

Think about it. It usually isn’t the 40-plus servers and sales folks who are dishing up the “perfects.” The perfect younger generation are sharing their take on irreproachable with everyone who’s just wanted a cup of Joe to go. Can’t wait for warmer weather, I’m going to the local ice creamery to order the perfect parfait! Ain’t nothing defective about that manner of thinking.

theresa@wellingtontimes.ca