Some of my best friends are

I believe people wouldn’t knowingly choose to be someone, or do something, that would cause us or our loved ones grief, pain or angst. I didn’t choose to be me. I was born the me that is me. I can choose to be a better version of me. I can choose to be a worse version me but, to quote Popeye the Sailor Man, “I yam what I yam.”

For those of you who don’t know me, and many of you think you do, I “yam” a woman who happens to be married to a man. Together, LOML and I have a passel of children. Some of our children have children of their own. All of our children are in loving relationships. Our children are loving and lovely people. LOML and I are parents and we are grandparents. For the most part, my life is and has been fairly ordinary. I know some of you beg to differ but ordinary is what it is. I choose to work hard. I choose to play hard. I choose to love big. I choose to like and to dislike stuff. I work at being openminded. I work at being kind. I worry about my family—their health, their safety and their happiness. I worry about my friends for all of the same reasons. For my family and my friends I would move mountains and slay dragons. Some of you think I don’t happen to have any internal dialogue at all. Perhaps not. I know I am more than a bit outspoken at times because I “yam” what I “yam”.

This week I “yam” a bit of a helicopter Mom. I am hovering over my children. I am worried. I am angry. I am hurt. I am frightened. I am afraid of what I might say to people who might be dangerous. I am afraid of what I might do. This week, my youngest COM’s fiancé shared a letter that had been sent to an unnamed couple in Kingston. The recipients just happen to be a same-sex couple. For your information, COM and her fiancé choose to make Kingston their home. Perhaps some of you have seen the letter, it is coarse and aggressive. It is filled with hatred and no-so-veiled threats of physical violence. Although the letter was not directed to COM or to her fiancé, the author(s) knew it would be shared publicly. They chose to make a threat to the public by sending that letter to that couple. The authors counted on the “shares”. It is a creepy letter from a misguided group of idiots who proudly state, “Our base, head office in Deep South, has been energized by the recent U.S. Supreme Court decisions legalizing same sex marriage (sic).” And it goes on, “Having observed you, we feel that you are committed lesbians unlikely to convert, hence this (first and only) gentle attempt to make you move.” Nothing like a hate letter to let you know your relocation could be a gentle relocation without any repercussions. The letter goes on to suggest this “group” has “contacts in KingstonPolice” and apparently have been successful in “relocating homosexuals under the umbrella of our Lord Jesus Christ.” These writers are bullies. They are dangerous, misguided, miserable excuses for humans who twist Christian teachings to serve their own needs. Oh yes they are, and are by choice.

These people aren’t really homophobic. I am so tired of bullies pretending to be phobic. Being homophobic would imply they are irrationally fearful of, or have an extreme aversion to, homosexuality. If that were the case, I think the letter writer(s) would be the ones antsy to move away from the source of their discomfort. I know, as a claustrophobic, you won’t catch me running to be the first person into the Chunnel or the Diefenbunker. Nope, those folks are not phobic. One part of the letter supports this, “Our efforts to relocate you will escalate. We wish to avoid this scenario. We are primarily non-violent, but use violence surgically to persuade people. We hope you understand without us painting to lurid a picture (sic).” And to round it all out, “you are not going to be safe at home, office or anywhere else if you ignore this message”.

These terrorists are not filled with fear, their intention is to generate fear. Generating fear in the hope of keeping the spotlight off them and their pitiful sense of self-worth, their withering insecurities, their psychological inadequacies and low self-esteem. I hope the police, both the city of Kingston and the OPP, have this hate-filled letter and are working to drag the bullies out of their dank closet.

theresa@wellingtontimes.ca