Columnists
World Cup of Soccer
On Sunday, the World Cup of Soccer final game will take place in Brazil, at 3 p.m. eastern time. The third-place game, as it is called, takes place on Saturday, at 4 p.m. At press time, three countries remain in the hunt for supremacy in the soccer world: the Netherlands, Argentina and Germany. They have survived from a group of countries that qualified to play in the tournament in Brazil. Canada did not make the cut. The Americans got there, but were knocked out before the list was whittled down to the final four.
In this neck of the woods, most supporters are in the Dutch camp. I have heard the whispers, “If you’re not Dutch, you’re not much”. Heading into the semifinal game on Wednesday, the Dutch know they will have their hands full against the Argentineans. Historically, South American teams have owned the Cup when it is played on their continent. The same applies when they play for the marbles in Europe. And, just in case you may not have been paying attention over the years, no North American country has ever won the cup.
For your information, soccer games are 90 minutes long, two 45 minute halves. For knockout games, where a winner must be declared, if the teams are tied after 90 minutes, they play a 30 minute overtime period. If the game is still tied after that period, the winner is determined in a shootout. However, the soccer people refer to that situation as penalties. Not penalty kicks, mind you, just penalties.
Without boring you with a complete rant about soccer, I will touch on a few concepts that drive North Americans crazy, particularly the hockey folk.
FAKERS
I know some European descendants who cover their faces in shame when they see the antics of professional soccer players. It is as if a sniper in the crowd has targeted a player. With little or no contact, he hits the turf, and appears to be in mortal danger. If the referee pulls out a yellow card, some of the pain subsides immediately. If a red card comes out—almost instant recovery. Some of this behaviour has carried over into hockey, shamefully. Those who act in this way will find comeuppance, sooner or later.
OFFICIATING
The field is too large and the game too fast, to have one referee to handle all of the work. I recommend three referees for the game. A lot of the nasty behind-the-play activity has been eliminated in hockey with the two referee system. More diving has been called with that extra pair of eyes on the ice. As well, they have to come up with a better system to call offside. It is far too nebulous. They need a blueline, of sorts.
THE LANGUAGE
As long as they are playing the game on our turf, it shall be called soccer. Football is entirely different. People who play football wear helmets. The game will be played on a field, not on a pitch. If you can’t put the ball on the net, you will get a zero, not a nil. That is just the start. I said I would not rant.
SUBSTITUTIONS
There is whole pile of nonsense that goes on when a team wants to change players. Signs are raised, plenty of hugging, high fiving, all that stuff. I recommend that they change “on the fly”, that is, pull someone off and put someone else on whenever necessary, without a stoppage in play. It would add an ounce or two of excitement to the game.
I am going to consult my Party Brazil Phrasebook now for further suggestions.
It is, after all, the beautiful game. In desperate need of improvement.
How did soccoer come to allow even three subs? But if you’re going to sub, it should be done with fanfare hugs kisses and a complete stoppage of play and a giant neon fInger in the sky pointing it out. NO CHANGING ON THE FLY!
Soccer should be played slowly, with skill. Fast skills should be red carded. The creative ability of a player is stymied because he would have done better agaist the tired player as opposed to a change on the fly. The sub should be made to hop around and just jab until he reaches the tired level of the player he replaced, then continue. We should really slow the game to where a player makes a skillfull move, stop play and come up with a thoughtful skillfull counter, stop play then counter…. It’s called playing with skill. Wouldn’t hockey be so much better if the six that stated the game played the whole way through, laying flat on their back the last 20 minutes watching the dome ceiling? I would by tickets just for the last 20 mins!
Ultimately, there’s something ‘American’ about making things better. My just hate America friends are content where they are – resistent to improvements.