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The “C” word
Very, very recently I heard someone in my family use the “C” word. Yep, someone had the nerve to say “Christmas” to me. Someone even suggested we could start planning the Parade Weekend and wondered if LOML and I had started making gifts yet! What the H E double candy canes! I’m still hoping there will be enough warmish days in the next week so I can finish painting the front porch. I’m still ogling my stockpile of teeny Hallowe’en Treats to be handed out to Tricksters and someone is yammering on about Santa Claus parading around the County! Again, I am overwhelmed by how quickly the days pass by. Didn’t I just put the table and umbrella out on the patio? Didn’t I just quietly whine about how hot and humid it was? At this very moment I hear the furnace tell me it’s cold enough to get down to business and ramp up the gas bill. NO! Just “no”, because I haven’t even put the lawn furniture away. No, because it’s still September in my mind and I’m not a happy camper. And speaking of camping, we haven’t done any of that this year. We upscaled some of our antique camping gear and never used it. There should have been more days between May and October. But here we are. I’m trying to keep my mitts off the Hallowe’en candy and someone is throwing the “C” word around as if it were paper towels at a Trump rally.
So, welcome to the grey, chilly, rainy days of late October. I used to get a bit down-in-the-dumps when the weather turned drab, like it did this past weekend. But you and I know I won’t melt in the rain. It’s just weather, right? I get it, the year is winding down. It’s already quarter to November, but hearing someone utter of the “C” word got my giblets in a stew. Who knows, maybe I should be getting ready for the festive season. Maybe I should I start stockpiling the treats, addressing and stamping the greeting cards, perhaps I should be looking for those perfect napkins and snappy crackers and then pick up rum for the eggnog and be checking my stash of wrapping paper and ribbons? But I’m the kind of person who doesn’t usually get too excited about the “C” season until after Parade Weekend has passed. However, it is on Parade Weekend when LOML’s exhaustive festive music collection and his festive DVD collection find their festive way into the family space. It’s on the Parade Weekend the “C” word tree gets dusted off, assembled then decorated to the hilt and lit-up like the “C” word tree it is meant to be. But not until Parade Weekend, right? I am right, thank you.
When I was younger and we had our children at home I was inspired by those friends and family who started their “C” word shopping two weeks after the holidays. I always thought I should become one of those people— more organized, less frantic. I should have been, but I just couldn’t do it. I’ve spent a lot of years wondering if I’m just one of those people who can only function efficiently if a deadline is looming. There’s nothing like a radio station jingle “It’s nineteen days till “C” word and “S” man’s on his way.” I just couldn’t get into to it too early. The interesting thing is, I do not like being late for appointments, meetings, lunches, you name it. I have little to zero tolerance for someone who is habitually late. But I give myself all kinds of space to be a last-moment person when it comes to getting ready for the “C” word holiday.
And here we are. By the time this hits the other blue box it’ll about a week until November first. Hallowe’en candy will be in sales bins by the checkout and “C” word candy will have taken its place on the shelves. You and I know full well I can’t be trusted with a pantry cupboard full of holiday treats too far in advance of the holiday. Let’s hear it for the drab and dreary skies of late October and early November. I won’t be inspired to get my jolly on until it’s cold enough to freeze the tinsel off the “C” word tree.
BTW, if you do happen to be an early “C” word shopper, by my reckoning you’ll need at least five advent calendars per person in your household to make it to December first. How do I know this? Some of you know me, most of you don’t.
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